Hey look! A post not dealing with Universe Defender! I am still going to work on that, I am still in the learning process!
Life has been pretty good lately. I pretty much isolated away from everyone except a couple family members, and oddly enough I been doing better. I never really talked about life on here, just interests that I have. I was never sure if I should speak about life, but since things are improving maybe I shall!
Why do I isolate? I have a very long history of people I get close to ditching me. Sometimes for dumb reasons like they been wanting to get away from me for a while. I never knew why. Or they started getting so bad that I had to walk away to keep my sanity. I just seem to never find good people to be around. I do have problems, but I am working on them. Mostly PTSD related. So it can be hard for me to find loyal friends who don’t allow me to walk away or don’t walk away themselves.
But the individual who caused my PTSD might be out of my life for good pretty soon, and that has me more prepared to work on it. I am excited and scared at the same time. I used to work on my issues for others so they would like me. But that was wrong. Now I am working on my issues so I can like myself and be proud of myself. In the end, that is what matters the most.
Outside of that, I am still learning C# and Unity and having a blast. Not doing as much as I was, but that is probably a good thing. I was learning 12+ hours every single day. I was pushing myself too hard. I also get hard on myself for not learning fast enough, but I can’t let that stop me. I can do whatever I set my heart on.
So yea. It is pretty weird for me to say: I have no friends, I isolate for 2+ months and no one cares, and yet I am happy. I think I am finally moving on and not trying to get others to care anymore. I used to check Discord every few days which is where most of my friends were. Messages? None. I uninstalled it. I can’t live on hope. I need stable friendships if they ever come around. If they don’t, that is ok!
Anyway! About to head off to good ol’ Sam’s Club to buy a couple jars of peanuts. Peanuts are life. Cheers!